Cuss Words aren't in the Dictionary- Human Karkat x Reader
by WindSprite
Summary: You're an intelligent student, right? Then why on earth are you being forced to babysit the new bratty student who was expelled from his last school? Oh right, BECAUSE YOU SIGNED UP FOR IT, THAT'S WHY!


**_AUTHORS NOTE_**

**__****Hi there, Sprite here with a new reader x fic! There is going to be a ****_lot_**** of cussing in future chapters, so you've been warned! I know this chapter is long and boring but I really wanted to introduce all the characters featured in it! The following chapters won't be as long but will likely have more interesting adventures in them, hope you enjoy!**

You stared at your laptop utterly confused.  
"Who's this?" you asked your classmate who sat directly next to you, pointing at the computer monitor. He complied looking at the screen and recognising the face instantaneously.  
"Uhh… Oh! I-I read 'bout this! This guy's caused a shitload of trouble. He apparently broke a bunch of rules. Usually it was small stuff like setting off the fire alarms and picking fights with other students. But he got expelled by trying to hack the school network and ended up blowing up the network. Most computers connected to the network had their own little firework show apparently! W-why?" The male looked down at you, watching your eyes studiously stare at the familiar face. "H-Hello? _?" he let out a huff and turned back to his computer screen, continuing with his English work.  
Why was this guy so interesting you ask? Well it just so happens that he's transferring to your school. Coincidentally, you knew the guy in kindergarten. Not that you remembered him. Apparently the two of you immensely hated each other. Not that you blamed yourself. This image refreshed those feelings. He was a red head, though that was only seen through the new roots. He had dies it black, seemingly, hair unkempt like his clothing. His pale red eyes had dark bags under them. Was that even possible? Maybe a genetic mutation perhaps? You know a friend with a similar mutation so it's possible. You guessed he had insomnia from the large, dark bags that drooped under his eyes. His skin was as pale as a ghost, with an exception for the freckles that spotted across his cheeks and nose. You hypothesised that he didn't really get out much. His uniform was well fitted, untidy but slim, his posture not as well held. He had a slight hunch, you guessed since he was obviously an indoors sort of person. The uniform was for a prestigious private school, much like your own, but for the gifted. He was bound to be a bit of a snob, you could feel it in your bones. You just wondered why he got there? What category did he classify in to be raised as a genius?  
But the thing that you hated was his expression. No smile. Not at all. His expression was blander than the taste of stale bread. It was a school picture for Christ sake! Show a little respect! You give these pictures to parents as a sign of a child growing up, yet he seemed to be acting less tolerable than a three year old having a tantrum. You hunched over, letting out a frustrated huff. You didn't want to smile on picture day, you had to admit. It was boresome and a waste of time, but you still respected the efforts of the people who set it up, pretending to wear your uniform in pride and pulling your hair out of your face for that once-a-year picture.  
"Are you done spacing out yet?" your classmate waves his hand in front of your face and you snap out of your analysis of the pricks personality. Your (e/c) orbs flicked to the male, stern and reflecting.  
"Yes, I think so" you mutter, closing the image and turning back to the male.  
"Why did you want to know? About him?" he asked quizzically, smile lopsided. Oh no, not again.  
"You have a thing for him?" You stare, disappointed. Of course he would ask something like that!  
"Tavros I helped you get control over that damned stutter and will damn well bring it back if I have to! Honestly, I expect more from you!" you scorn him, brown eyes looking at you with clear distress. You sigh and pat his shoulder. You hesitated, disliking the idea of affection, but continue anyway. You knew Tavros well enough to pat his shoulder.  
"Sorry, I'm not in the best of moods" you mumble. He sighed in relief, lopsided smile reappearing. He runs an awkward hand though his light brown hair, hazel eyes returning to yours.  
"Okay so why then?" He returned to his original question, much to your surprise. He usually quit it after you had a little spaz, but he must be rather interested to ask again.  
"He's transferring here tomorrow" you mutter, voice brash. You knew the assigned seating arrangement like the back of your hand. Two spots were open in home room, one next to you and one in front of you. Second row, next to the window was your seat, if your memory served you correct. Tavros sat behind you, so home room was usually tolerable. All you had to do was face Tavros in homeroom for ten minutes, if he were in your class that is. Then you were home free.  
Unless, of course, he shared other classes with you. You face-palmed. You would like to think that Kankri would have to do the new student tour, but he was a senior. You were a junior. And the only one in your age group who signed up for the official student buddy signup. You double face palmed. Seems like you have officially signed yourself up for hell. But still, you crossed your fingers. Kankri still might take the job, since he does love lecturing students on the premises and its rules. You stretch your back and regain your posture.  
"I'm going to the student council room when class ends," you sigh, looking at Tavros side on "you can come if you like?". You hear him giggle lightly, hands resting on the keyboard as he regained his composure.  
"I'd rather be hit by a car… a-again" he snorted, continuing his typing. You smile and nod curtly  
"Thought as much. Tell the group I'm off to talk with Kankri. Knowing him, I'll end up spending the whole forty-five minutes there" you put your laptop to sleep and close the top. You hastily closed the case. "If I want to catch him while he's there I'm going to have to run, so I'm sorry for not escorting you like I usually do" Tavros lets out a laugh under his breath and nods.  
"I-it's cool, I'll get Jade to wheel me there" he smiles awkwardly, tapping the shoulder in front of him.  
Pretty green eyes turn to Tavros, an overbite burdened grin now visible.  
"Could you wheel me around Jade? I-I'm sorry for the inconvenience it's just _ is going to talk to Kankri" Tavros let out a quiet laugh. Jades eyes sparkled as if she'd just been proposed to.  
There is a reason why you wheel Tavros around, and it's not because you like it. Whenever Jade wheels him around she always pretends she's playing race ca- _RIIIIIIIIIIING  
_You clutch your laptop case, forgetting your train of thought, and bolt out of the room, giving Tavros an apologetic look, then continuing to sprint to the student council room. The halls were being flooded, meaning you had to rely on memory to get you there, and surely enough you found the large white door. Old staple marks were visible, obviously having been brashly pulled out. A piece of paper was stapled to it reading "student council" though someone had yet again vandalised the paper, this time with drawings of male genitals. You sighed pulling the page off and tossing it into the bin.  
Taking a look down at your uniform, you dusted off your black just above the knee length skirt. You straightened up your tie, making sure the diagonally striped pattern of red and purple was visible. Your checked the cuffs of your long sleeve shirt, adjusting the collar so it was over the dark grey uniform sweater. You straightened your back and put on a smile. Kanri would end up lecturing you if your uniform was anything but perfect. You knocked on the door thrice before entering quietly.  
"Kankri?" you hollered, taking a step into the office. There was a clattering noise from behind the student leaders desk. A pale hand raised up from behind it giving a brisk wave before continuing its current activity.  
"Over here" the voice replied and you sat in the chair in front of the desk. A blond appeared from behind the desk, pale red eyes adjusting to your appearance and a small smile pulled at the corner of pale lips. Thin hands adjusted the school leaders red blazer, before he sat down, hands folding in lap.  
"What is the matter? You seem to be rather stressed" He smiles, and you frown in response.  
"Why say that? Do I look stressed?" You ask, cocking your head on its side. Kankri pointed at your hair.  
"I do believe your hair is in a mess. That is a sign of stress is it not? My apologies if I have somewhat triggered you, but it is very unlike you to have your hair in such a mess! Usually your uniform is in perfect blah blah blah blah…" you sigh. Now you've done. The only way to get the message out now is to state it until he hears you.  
"Could you please take him as student buddy?" You ask, interrupting his waffling and he stops in his tracks. His face remains blank but his eye twitches. That's odd, you think to yourself as he gulps and adjusts his tie.  
"You do realize it's very triggering to interrupt a person in the midst of an impor-"  
"Could you please take him as student buddy?" You repeat yourself, and Kankri shuffles in his seat. Is he… Hiding something? No that's impossible! Kankri Vantas only speaks truth, if your memory served you correctly!  
"You did it agai-"  
"And will continue until you respond to my question. Could you please take him as student buddy?" You always felt like an ignorant douchebag when interrupting Kankri, but it was a needed to get him to purse his lips.  
"But he is not in my grade! It would be atrocious to miss out on any of my own class work! I would never-" He paused at the sight of your unamused expression.  
"That's odd. Last time I checked you would give up any time of day to amuse a new student. Why not give them the best start at a new school? I'm sure the teacher will be happy to-"  
"_PHEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" _You covered yourears at the sound of Kankri's 'trigger whistle' as he liked to call it. You gritted your teeth as he stopped, adjusting to your ringing ears. You could hear a faint muffle and as it slowly died down you heard him wheeze before shuffling under his desk. You frowned. Supporting evidence? Kankri usually relies on his words to brief an issue. The blond popped up from behind the desk, placing a file on the desk with an exaggerated sigh. You gave him a confused look and he gestured to the file.  
Picking it up and flicking the cover off, you saw a picture. It was, in fact, the same picture you had seen not ten minutes ago. That was a rough approximation, perhaps. Time flies by when Kankri runs his mouth.  
"What about him?" You looked up, Kankri's lips pursed before sighing again.  
"His name"  
"What?"  
"His name should give some insight on my current predicament" Kankri grumbled, laying his face on his desk. He seemed in a bit of distraught. You pulled the picture out of the file and scanned the profile.  
"Karkat Vantas, 16, Male, C standard student- wait… He's a Vantas?" You looked up at Kankri, who was now hunched over and pouting "He's your brother?"  
"That is true. He is quiet embarrassing. And violent too, both verbal and physical. He has a bit of small man syndrome as you would call it. If I approximate now, he would be about a centimetre or two over you."  
"Why don't you want to give him the tour? He is your brother, after all" you mutter, cursing yourself. How could you not have realised this before? Kankri also has the eye mutation, and both are rather short, comparing to a lot the males at school. They have the same structure and body shape. The only differences were the hair colour, Kankri not having freckles, the bags under the eyes, and their posture. As well as Kankri looking a tad older.  
"He would just complain the whole time. You should be a refreshing difference to the little devil" He smiled, looking at the clock and back to you. "If you leave now, you could still eat lunch. Unless, of course, you want to listen to my new findings on triggers! I have found some interesting information on-" You were out of the seat faster than you could say "#time consuming lectures".  
You patted his hair down and smiled.  
"There is a spot at our table if you ever need it" you wave before quickly absconding to the cafeteria.  
Jade was flying around the hall, Tavros being used as a bumper as she skidded into one table to the next. As she flies by in front of you, you nonchalantly clutch the wheel closest to you, she flies over the railings into the thankfully empty table in front of you. She ends up upside down, skirt down and by down you mean up around her chest, revealing bike shorts. Her initial mix of surprise and pain quickly disappeared into gleeful goofyness.  
"LETS DO THAT AGAIN!" she howled, rolling off of the table and landing like a gymnast. You looked on bemused, before towing Tavros to the table where your group sat.  
"Oh your no fun _! Pupa boy was totally enjoying his ride" A sly voice drooped from behind, hooking an arm over your neck.  
"Vriska. You know how I feel about touching" you roll your eyes, knowing that you always lose this battle.  
You've known Vriska since middle school. She's like the annoying little sister you never wanted. You had a daily reoccurrence of her doing something wrong and you telling her off. You were surprised she hadn't been kicked out of school after all the ridiculous petty crimes she'd commited. But still, you were glad. She was still a close friend.  
"Helloooooooo? Anybody in there?" snapping fingers bought you out of your reminiscent memories. Much to your discontent, Tavros was now being taken away from you. You gave her a death stare and she knew fairly well to back off.  
"But Dave! Justice must be served to those poor chairs!" You heard a high voice demand, followed by a tense "no"  
An albino was holding a small girls arm back. A large yellow sash that went over the flat chested female signalled that yes, she was the hall monitor. Her shoulder length bright red hair was bouncing as she struggled from the males grip. Triangular red glasses sat on her elfish nose, matching her candy red, dragon headed, completely against school uniform you would add, walking stick. The name Terezi Pyrope was embedded into the red dragon shaped wristband  
The male had large police officer shades on, not that it was required indoors. His hair was pale enough to classify as white, not that it concerned you. A wristband, similar to the females wristband but white had the name 'David Strider' embedded into it. These two were a couple, though at most times they seemed like best friends. It was healthy, and they, along with John and Vriska, where the couples at your group.  
At first you were against having couples among the group, but after a reasonable amount of debating with John and Dave, you conceded. Not that Dave really argued. He mainly just sat there, waiting idly for his girlfriend to show up.  
You let out a huff, signalling to Dave to let Terezi go. He seemed doubtful but obliged. You sat down at the table and pulled out a muesli bar, eating it with as much etiquette you could manage. You looked up to see bright blue eyes in a deep saturation of concentration. He looked up briefly as he pulled messy black hair behind his ears giving a quick buck toothed grin before immersing himself back into the page in front of him. You looked over at Dave who shrugged.  
"Little man's got to plan his SAT's" he replied to you look bluntly, voice monotone. You nodded and stood.  
The hall was clearing with vast speed, which signalled it was your time to leave. You gave a curt wave before escorting Tavros and yourself out of the cafeteria, ignoring the commotion between moron A and B. A being Vriska and B being Terezi.

You hoped that the 'little devil' as Kankri had called him, didn't share any classes with him. Maybe if you avoided Vriska for the rest of the day, her bad luck won't rub off on you.  
You had little sleep that night. Not that you were nervous or anything. You simply had missed out on English work today due to you spacing out while looking at the picture. And then when you finished that, you thought of all the other work you could be doing. So you completed your history report three weeks in advance, finished writing the setup for your experiment in chemistry, and finally did extra credit for media by completing a film for awards night. With all that done and dusted, you happily drifted off to a dreamless sleep.

**-THE NEXT MORNING-**

You let out an exhausted huff as you exited the student council room, a good five kilograms of books and textbooks in tow. Apparently Kankri, as he had said to you had "regretfully forgotten to give Karkat his schooling utensils" which you had to now lug around until second period, where you had to then lug the ginger himself around. Unless he was in your homeroom. You hope to god he isn't in your homeroom.  
You stand at the doorway and look into the classroom. You were running a bit late but knew the teacher would understand. No new students? You let out a sigh of relief to see both of the empty spots still empty. You inhaled deeply, before knocking on the frame briefly. The teacher came to the door swiftly, the door opening wide.  
"I see you are a bit late, you must have been escorting the new student to class right?" The teacher gestured behind you and you froze. You carefully turned on your heels. Pale red eyes, just above your eye level, were now visible. His hair was an absolute ginger mess, but the black dye had been washed out thoroughly. He rolled his bagged eyes.  
"You're fucking kidding, right? I don't need anyone, let alone this bitch, to direct me to a class! That's is what a map is for you idiot!" he huffed, voice coarse. He obviously yells a lot, from what you could tell. At least now you understood why Kankri had called him "verbally violent". The teacher looked on, horrified.  
"I gave you no such permission to use that language Mr Vanta-"  
"I don't need your fucking 'permission' to speak English. Now can I go inside? Or do I have to ask politely like this fuckwad would?" He gestured to you and you gritted your teeth together.  
"Don't call me that" You grumble, glaring with as much threat as possible.  
"Don't talk to me" he glared and you shuffled back. How rude! You shifted your way past the frozen teacher who looked at you in distress. You dropped the books on the teacher's desk, pulling your shoulders back, and sitting down at your chair with anger glazing over your eyes. A hand tapped your shoulder gently and you wrapped your neck around.  
"A-are you alright?" Hazel eyes looked on, worry in full view. You rubbed your neck, looking away.  
"Yeah. Fine" you paused as the teacher let the student through, normal cheer replaced with a grimace.  
"Class, this is Karkat Vantas" she looked at him as he sat down in front of you. He rolled his eyes. A bundle of whispers rolled through the classroom.  
"He's school leader's brother right?" and "Isn't he the guy who blew up all the computers at his school?" were the most common. You pursed your lips and sat facing Tavros. He looked more concerned than usual, his doe like eyes were now pursuing an answer. Something you didn't have. Or at least didn't want to have.  
"He's just an asshole, that's all" you mutter, Tavros's eyes going wide at the sight of you swearing. Crap, his cussing is rubbing off on you.  
You felt something ghost you hair and you froze. It gripped a hunk of your hair and yanked. There it was. And there were those eyes again.  
"Don't talk behind someone's back when they're behind yours, fuckwad. You don't even know me! What gives you the fucking right to judge?" He hissed, still gripping your hair. You weren't going to let him win this.  
"Says the one who instantly decided that I'm not only a female dog but a 'fuckwad'? God you're rude! Let go of my hair this instant!" You spat and he let go, seemingly in shock. It soon turned out that he was flustered.  
You patted your hair down. You were losing your cool. Last time you lost your cool was in middle school where you became a swearing mess. The other ended up going to hospital with a broken nose. You rubbed your hands together. They suddenly felt dirty. Your throat was dry.  
You began to wheeze and shuffle uncomfortably. You were not going to have a panic attack in the middle of class under any circumstance.  
Taking a deep breath, you settled you gaze on the red head. He was now gaining control of his senses. His pale freckled face contorted.  
"I'm your student buddy for the day, by the way. Could I please see your timetable?" you asked as politely as you could manage, controlling the tone of your voice so it didn't sound like you were giving him a death threat. He roughly pulled a folded piece of paper out of his pocket and dropped it on the table.  
"Have it. I memorised it so I won't need it anyway" He muttered, sitting so he was facing forward again. You heard him say something under her breath along the lines of "I'm going to kill Kankri" and "why her?" but you really didn't care.  
"You have to be joking me" You groan, placing the now unfolded piece of paper on the table. Maths C, Physics, English Authority, Media, Creative Arts and finally Philosophy. It all matched up with yours, excluding philosophy, in which you have Authority Art.  
You huffed, folding the paper and handing it back to him.  
"Are you fucking deaf? I told you I don't want it!" He was yelling again. It was beginning to really tick you off.  
You scrunched up the paper, throwing it into the bin across the room. It landed without a whisper.  
"How the-? Wha?" He seemed rather astonished at your ability. In truth, both practice and physics were on your side. You could go on about different Physics theories that you really doubt he'd understand, but talking to him was giving you a head ache.  
The teacher had marked the roll in silence, so when the bell rang you jumped out of your chair to behind Tavros's chair, and began wheeling him out of class.  
You looked behind you, Karkat slumped over his desk. Was he… Taking a nap? You left Tavros next to the doorframe and tapped his bony shoulder.  
No response.  
You flicked his head and he screeched, clawing at the table. He paused, after a minute then looked at you furiously.  
"WHAT THE UTTER FUCK! I WAS SLEEPING, YOU RUDE BI- OWOWOWOW" You were now dragging him by his ear, him squirming against your grip. You clutched the books he'd need from the teacher's desk and quickly absconded.  
This day was bound to be interesting. And loud. Very, VERY loud.


End file.
